So, if after seriously, like, HOURS of kicking it at the Walmart Eye Center, where you have been waiting all sorts of patiently (aw, who am I kidding, right?) for Rudesby McSpitsalot, the gum-snapping, busywalking Walmart Vision Care Specialist, whose nametag declares (falsely, might I add), "Hi! You Are Important To Me!", an assertion you perhaps might have fallen for had it not been for the *snap* *snap* Oh No You DI'NT attitude thrown at you by the aforementioned VC Specialist McSpits, who for reasons unfathomable felt justified in freaking the hell out over the three whole seconds it took out of her busy, busy life to type your name into the computer and simply look up the elusive Tray Number for your youngest daughter's new glasses, a number that-- YES-- you should have been able to supply her had you NOT forgotten your sales slip at home because it was a spur of the moment decision to brave the pre-Christmas crowds at Walmart that day, and did I mention that your name was already in the computer anyway?! because it totally was?!...
*phew* Hold on a sec, mm'kay? I have figuratively run out of breath. Must! Breathe! Oxygen!... Wait. Was that all one sentence? It was?! Mercy me! I do run on at the mouth, don't I? Oh my goodness gracious!
Let me try again: So, if after all this wait-time, your nine-year-old son approaches you wearing the most hilarious pair of oversized, Napoleon Dynamite glasses-- the type that went out of style even for your grandpa at least a decade ago, the kind that make you wonder how in the world they expect to unload these monstrosities even on an unsuspecting, eyewear-challenged population-- and he says "Look! I'm Napoleon Dynamite!' and then hands you a pair, would you throw caution to the wind-- risking life, limb, devaluation of your street cred with the urban demo-- and just friggin' try those flippin' SWEET suckers on for size?
Like there was ever any doubt. Honestly.
- Circus Kelli commented:
That is AWESOME. :)
- » 11/29/2005 10:13 AM
- Ern commented:
You are a super-cool mom.
- » 11/29/2005 11:09 AM
- Charlotte in Pa commented:
"It's like a lion and a tiger mixed... bred for its skills in magic."
- » 11/29/2005 11:09 AM
- hemlock commented:
Liger...just makes me want to see that movie for a 4th time. Just have to persuade the honey bunch.
How could anyone possibly resist those glasses?? I know I couldn't.
- » 11/29/2005 11:24 AM
- mrtl commented:
I can't believe they still sell those things.
- » 11/29/2005 11:44 AM
- WILLIAM commented:
McSpitsalot? Don't they have the Mcspittle sandwich?
- » 11/29/2005 12:52 PM
- kalki commented:
I looove you and your photo-snapping one-sentence-paragraphing self.
- » 11/29/2005 8:13 PM
- Amy commented:
Oh Ye-ahw. Those are some great big glasses. You guys look fantastico.
- » 11/29/2005 8:24 PM
- LadyBug commented:
That is just awesome, that you have fun with your kiddos like that.
I'm thinking maybe I need to see Napoleon Dynamite.
(Word Verification: yqiosc. Yeah, like I'm gonna get THAT one right on the first try.)
- » 11/29/2005 10:54 PM
- Vajana commented:
ohmi GOSH those are cool glasses.
Now go get yourself some tater tots and call it a day.
- » 11/30/2005 10:29 PM
- Bente commented:
I've yet to see this movie, but definitly plan too! This picture is so cute. I love your family!
- » 12/01/2005 4:40 AM
- wordgirl commented:
Oh! The hideosity of those frames! It burneth my eyes!
No really, slap some dark lenses in those frames and you'd have exact those ginormous sunglasses that Nicole Ritchie likes to wear. Really, awful!
New blogger...come visit!
- » 12/02/2005 10:35 AM