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Desperate Working Mommas
Your one-stop site for fanatical television snarking, questionable political analysis, occasional attempts to address the parenting issues facing working mothers, and halfhearted promises to stop obsessing about the entertainment industry, already! Oh, not to mention the random bitching and moaning. There's always that.
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel FINE.

Wow. I am not sure if this has ever happened before and quite frankly I am a bit frightened. Seriously. A teensy bit scared over here. The apocalypse, it is imminent, my friends. Or at the very least, hell should be freezing over momentarily. Fact is... oooooh, dare I utter the words aloud? Will I be jinxing myself to a lifetime of frustratingly irresolute resolutions with this one earth-shattering revelation? Will I?! Huh?! I NEED TO KNOW. GOSH! Okay fine, rebel that I am, I am going to totally chance it. Fact is... I actually stuck to my 2005 New Year's resolutions.

I KNOW, right?! How is that even POSSIBLE?! Right? Right?! But check it, yo: Me = Happy? Check. Kids and hubby = happy? Check, check. Lose some poundage doing the Tae Bo or something? Let's just say I went above and beyond, mm'kay, and can I hear a big "Hell, yeah! CH-CH-CHECK!"?

I mean, lookit! There they are in black and white, all right and tight and formal and official-like and whatnot! And I stuck to 'em, by golly! Stuck to 'em GOOD. Well, okay, with the exception of #4, as sadly I continued to obsess about Joan and Adam's love life, but Barbara Hall did indeed TOTALLY jump the shark (in the process of said shark-jumping committing a grossly negligent act of character assassination, I might add) and Joan of Arcadia was subsequently cancelled, so my obsession was justified, you see? Do you? But as it was cancelled midyear, I did in point of fact TECHNICALLY stop obsessing over Joan and Adam's love life by the END of the year. Eh? Eh?! Take that, 2005 New Year's resolutions! Cat = WINNAH!

Seriously. There is definitely much to be said for a little something I like to call Lowering the Bar. No more "Remember to wash the sheets once a month, whether they need it or not!" or "Refrain from calling TGIM 'Dorkus' in the vicinity of... people!" or "Watch less television!" or "Say 'yo' and 'totally' and 'biznitch' less often!' or DIFFICULT resolutions like those! No sir! Keep 'em simple, I say. That way? Victory will be mine. Oh, yes. It WILL be mine.

Naturally, I am feeling extraordinarily proud and self-righteous right now. I am pretty unbearable to be around, actually. I will probably have to throw myself a little party. With balloons. And donuts. Definitely donuts. And a nice cake, perhaps, with the words, "Way to GO, Cat! You Rock SOLID!" in large, pink, fancifully curved lettering across the top.

Further, I have decided to craft my 2006 New Year's resolutions strikingly similar in appearance to last year's, you know, with the hope of puffing up myself further in my own esteem? So here goes the 2006 New Year's resolutions thingy:

In 2006 I will...

#1 Be happy.

#2 Make sure my husband and kiddos are happy.

#3 Train for and compete in a 10K. I am so not kidding.

#4 Finish my novel (and by "finish," I mean "type the words 'The End' wherever I am in the story at 11:59 PM on December 31, 2006")

#5 Stop obsessing about Veronica and Logan's love life, and, um, whether or not I will be seeing Logan shirtless or pantless again, but this time in the same vicinity as Veronica, who should also be shirtless or pantless (whichever, I'm not picky), and whether or not UPN bigwigs will go out of their frickin' minds and totally cancel this show.

Except, I am totally just kidding about #5 because come on... attempt to be realistic much? And of course you will notice I did NOT mention a thing about obsessing over American Idol. Because again with the realistic goal-setting thing. Why set myself up for failure? Duh! But #1 - 4? I'm all over 'em!

Bring it on, 2006. Oh, yes. Bring it freaking ON.

link | posted by Cat at 9:42 AM

Anonymous kalki commented:

I kept mine, too! Except for the Keep Counters Clear of Dirty Dishes one, but that was really just a goal to be aimed for and not technically met. So we should have a donut/cake/balloons party together to celebrate our dual ROCKage.

And yep, my 2006 resolutions also look uncannily similar to my 2005 ones. Because I do NOT handle failure well. At all.

» 1/03/2006 10:44 AM 
Blogger mrtl commented:

Bitches talking about pastry parties without me? wah!!!

I can't remember if I even bothered making resolutions last year, so I guess I'm not deserving of a donut party.

» 1/03/2006 11:13 AM 
Blogger not-so-normal mom commented:

Good Girl. I've lowered my bar so far that I may have a resolution that goes something like this: Eat more chocolate and gain five pounds.
You rock! I can't wait to see you on the news in the marathon!

» 1/03/2006 11:44 AM 
Blogger LadyBug commented:

Oooh, congrats to you, Cat!


» 1/03/2006 11:45 AM 
Blogger WILLIAM commented:

Solid as a rock. Quite a feat.

And to quote a certain Cheerleading movie. "OH its been brought."

» 1/03/2006 12:16 PM 
Blogger Vajana commented:

Lowering the bar is a theme of mine, in fact, maybe I should go right over and change my blog name...

I have no resolutions. But I LOVE yours. They are cool!

» 1/03/2006 12:54 PM 
Blogger Amy commented:

You shoulda put "Bring happiness and hilarity and general awesomeness to the internet" on there too, for 2005.

Because you? Totally did.

» 1/03/2006 4:56 PM 
Blogger Bente commented:

Good job, Cat! Good luck with this year's resolutions.

» 1/03/2006 5:21 PM 

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