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Desperate Working Mommas
Your one-stop site for fanatical television snarking, questionable political analysis, occasional attempts to address the parenting issues facing working mothers, and halfhearted promises to stop obsessing about the entertainment industry, already! Oh, not to mention the random bitching and moaning. There's always that.
Friday, March 31, 2006
Delusions of Grandeur and All That Jazz

I'm losing my mind. Seriously. I can't concentrate on work. I can't sleep. I can't eat. Okay, I can eat. But the concentrating and sleeping parts? Totally true.

You see, I am currently obsessed with writing a screenplay. And not just any screenplay-- oh, no, no, no!-- but a screenplay of epic proportions! Yes! An Oscar-worthy screenplay! A screenplay that perfectly captures the absolutely riveting story I have whizzing around in my head, the story that I can't stop thinking about. It's a "dramedy." Or, oooh, a "comma," if you will. You know, a comedy-slash-drama? Well, honestly, it's more drama than comedy, so I guess it's a dramedy after all. Which, BOO, because as far as portmanteau terms go, "comma" totally ROCKS.

I mean, listen. I even bought software. SOFTWARE! And not just any software, but expensive screenwriting software. I can see My Crazy reflected in TGIM's eyes when he looks at me, all like, "Oh my good lord, you just spent HOW MUCH on that screenwriting software you just installed on your iFred, you silly, silly girl?!" And my eyes are like, "But, the muse, TGIM! I can't fight THE MUSE!" (Heh. Which naturally reminds me of the opening scene of Xanadu, right before the Muses come to life, when Sonny says, "Aw, what the hell. Guys like me shouldn't dream anyway..." Which, allow me to say? Worst. Delivery. EVER.) And I get all excited and I drag my laptop around with me and type like mad and mutter to myself things like, "Yeah, American Beauty has NOTHING on this bad boy! And what? Good Will Hunting who?" et cetera, and generally act like a crazy person with access to kickass Mac technology, and I say to myself, "DUDE, you must chill. Because of the children."

Then, of course, I remember another screenplay I wrote, which was a fun little romantic comedy, and I wonder, Wait. Should I go back and rewrite and polish that story first? And then I remember that the market is simply glutted with romantic comedies and I agonize over whether it would even be marketable if I COULD get it past the dreaded slush pile on the desk of the assistant to the assistant to the guy who delivers coffee to the famous Hollywood agent. And The Crazy starts all over again.

So, really, the fact that in my bleary-eyed, early-morning, get-myself-dressed-in-the-dark-so-as-not-to-wake-TGIM haste, I pulled on my super comfy, super ugly UGGs with jeans and a kicky blue blazer (with pink lining! aaaaaaw!)... well, my unfortunate Casual Friday wardrobe choice is the very least of my worries. No matter how many curious stares I got on the Metro at 5:00 this morning. Right? Honestly, though. It's as if these people had never seen fluffy pink UGGs before! GOSH! Oh, just kidding. They're beige. And decidely un-fluffy. I may wear UGGs, but I draw the line at walking around with furry twin Muppets on my feet. But still. UGGs at work? Dude. What was I thinking?

So, yeah. If you find my sanity, please send it back right away. I've been looking everywhere for it.

link | posted by Cat at 9:46 AM


14 Comments:
Blogger WILLIAM commented:

Cat, I wish you the best with the screen play. That has always been a hobby of mine. Are you using Final Draft. That is what I use. I like it because it is simple and easy to use. I would love to read the other one that you wrote.

But don't stop doing the novel.

» 3/31/2006 10:40 AM 
Blogger Circus Kelli commented:

Sweetie -- sanity is TOTALLY overrated. At least, that's what they tell me.

» 3/31/2006 10:42 AM 
Blogger Cat commented:

william: Yes it IS Final Draft and I'm LOVING it. I wrote my other with Magic Movie Screenwriter which I was not all that impressed with, to tell you the truth. And I'm still writing the novel, too. Thus, the Crazy. :) Freak. It all started when my sister told me that her new best friend is intimately acquainted with Ron Howard...

CK: You = silly! And thanks for the vote of insane confidence. (*takes deep, cleansing breath*) SERENITY NOW!

» 3/31/2006 10:46 AM 
Blogger Vajana commented:

oh and we can say we knew ya way back when you weren't cavorting with the uber stars.

Can't wait to see it on the big screen!

» 3/31/2006 11:49 AM 
Blogger Misty commented:

Not crazy at all Cat!! I write (have never tried a screen play) and free-lance for the most part right now-and writing can consume my every thought some days..! Go for it and I love that you are doing that!

» 3/31/2006 4:04 PM 
Blogger Nilbo commented:

I tried Final Draft but switched to Scenewriter Pro ... I don't know that there's much to choose - it's just whatever gets your muse amused ...

I love that you're writing a screenplay, and it's not silly at all. Look at what is released year after year after year in Hollywood ... there really is room for smart ...

We should form a Bloggers Screenwriters Guild. Seriously.

» 3/31/2006 6:18 PM 
Blogger Ern commented:

Ok, am I the only person who didn't know that you could get special screenwriting software? What does it do exactly? I'm intrigued! Are you writing your novel using special novelwriting software? What would that be like?

» 3/31/2006 9:26 PM 
Blogger Nilbo commented:

I'm not sure if you're the ONLY one, who didn't know Ern, but ... you're one. Yes, there are a number of screenwriting programs that automatically format your screenplay correectly.

Readers in the film industry are so inundated on a daily basis that any screenplay not precisely formatted to exact (and well-known) industry standards gets discarded without a second glance. Want to use "ariel black" instead of boring old Courier? Yeah, that sound you heard was your screenplay hitting the wastepaper basket. Want to make your screenplay a little easier to read by increasing the font size or fiddling with the margins? Not even a glance - right into the recycling bin. Their theory is, "we only want screenplays from pros - and pros know how to format."

There are a number of screenwriting programs - some free, some hideously expensive. The good news is the expensive ones aren't much better or different from the cheap or free ones - the bells and whistles the pricey ones offer are more along the lines of "eye candy" as opposed to practical, functional advantages you'd use every day.

A screenwriting program is pretty much a basic tool if that's what you want to write. There may be some sort of program for writing novels, but I've never heard of one - I just pay attention to margins and appearance and let it unfold.

» 4/01/2006 8:50 AM 
Blogger Cat commented:

A Bloggers' Screenwriters Guild?
Ooooh, I like...

» 4/01/2006 12:38 PM 
Blogger Nilbo commented:

I'm not kidding. Community ... guidance ... knowledgable, supportive critique ... and pressure to meet deadlines (which I'm guessing I'm not the only one who needs) .... all good, all necessary ... and right here for us.

Why not?

» 4/01/2006 8:53 PM 
Blogger Drama Mama commented:

Hello superwoman....I can barely make it to work and make sure the kids are fed much less write in the meantime. Much as I would LOVE to.

Kuddos.

» 4/02/2006 8:18 AM 
Blogger Bente commented:

Good luck with the screenplay, Cat. I'll be looking forward to seeing your name up on the big screen someday!

» 4/02/2006 4:47 PM 
Blogger RJL commented:

I know one thing,writing is hard.You have to keep plugging at it,rewriting,revisioning,polishing.It would help ti have a hook or what Hollywood calls a "high concept",something that has not done before.There is an excellent website by Terry Rossio (writer of Pirates of the Carribean and Shrek)called wordplay.Highly recommended for any aspiring screenwriter.(www.wordplay.com)Good Luck

» 4/02/2006 8:50 PM 
Blogger RJL commented:

Oh yeah,by the way,the bloggers screenwriters guild is a great idea.

» 4/02/2006 9:00 PM 

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