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Desperate Working Mommas
Your one-stop site for fanatical television snarking, questionable political analysis, occasional attempts to address the parenting issues facing working mothers, and halfhearted promises to stop obsessing about the entertainment industry, already! Oh, not to mention the random bitching and moaning. There's always that.
Thursday, March 24, 2005

Omygawsh! Before I start, I would just like to say I am both deeply honored and privileged to be given this Very Special Opportunity to share my cherished thoughts and deep-flowing feelings regarding the astonishing power of reading and literature in my life. I'd like to thank my mother, who instilled in me a love of reading and taught me that books are a gift. This is truly, truly a sign that you like me, you really like me! Thank you, mrtl, for this SO totally undeserved honor!

1. What book would I like to be?
Gosh! This is SO hard. Hmmm, what to be, what to be...? Wait. What kind of dumb-ass question is this? Be a book? What, literally? I mean, wouldn't that be a bit of step back in the whole evolutionary scheme of things, you know what I'm sayin'? I mean, hello?! Who's with me?! 'Cha!

Okay, fine. I'll play along. Ooooh, look at me, I'm a book! I'm the freaking Oxford-Duden German Dictionary: German/English, English/German!! I contain over 260,000 words and phrases and am acclaimed by language professionals the world over as the most comprehensive, accurate, and up-to-date dictionary of German and English! I get to travel and say things like "Guten Tag!" and "Wo ist die Toilette?" Woo-woo! Look at me!


2. Have I ever had a crush on a fictional character?
Oh, ho, ho! Why, yes I have! He was Gilbert Blythe of Anne of Green Gables lore, that roguish hunk of sensitive Canadian flesh. I was all, "Wassup, Anne with an 'e'? Why you be hatin' on my man Gil? Your hair IS red, dammit, so you better just step off, bizzyotch!!"... um, "Eh?"

Seriously, I must admit, when he finally professed his love to Anne, and she-- because of her completely misguided romantic sensibilities-- totally failed to see his worth and ruthlessly rejected him (See? Skank!), I absolutely ADORED him for spitting out this gem: "I hope he breaks your heart, whoever he is. Then, maybe you'll come to your senses." I cried like a baby when she DID come to her senses and they kissed. Oh, look at me, I'm all a-tingle.
*sigh* What a man.

3. What is the last book I bought?
Georgette Heyer's The Unknown Ajax. Good, solid, escapist, Regency-era novel of adventure and romance! What can I say? I'm a sucker for the woman's stories. She was a genius.

Disclaimer: Georgette Heyer's books are NOT, as TGIM calls it, girl porn. There are absolutely NO heaving breasts, smoldering glances, or throbbing members. Maybe, just maybe, a stolen kiss. On the hand. Fair warning.

4. What is the last book I read?
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time by Mark Haddon. It is the story of a fifteen-year-old autistic boy named Christopher John Francis Boone "who knows all the countries of the world and their capitals, and every prime number up to 7,057." After the sudden and shocking death of his dog, Christopher, who lives in London with his dad, sets out to discover the mutt's murderer. It's the most amazing book, y'all, and it's written from the autistic boy's perspective, which, as you can imagine, is at times jarring, at others enlightening, but ultimately poignant and moving. Is that redundant? Oh, whatev. Awesome book.

5. What book am I currently reading?
Does Glamour count? No? Crap. Wait. I'm reading Pippi in the South Seas by Astrid Lindgren with my girls, which is my absolute favorite of the Pippi series. Are there any Pippi virgins in the hizzouse?? (oooh, check out THAT big shout-out to Rory of Gilmore Girls!) I mean, Kurrekurredutt Island? Coconuts? Pirates? Sharks, for Pete's sake?! Good times.

6. What 5 books would I take with me if I were stranded on a desert island?

1. I Capture the Castle by Dodie Smith: Lovely, lovely book to help me escape scary thoughts of cannibalism and flesh-eating animals.

2. The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis: I am counting all seven books as one, mm-kay? And I am reading them in the proper order, new-fangled publishers be damned. Hey! It's my stinking deserted island!

3. How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie: What?! "Fundamental Techniques in Handling People"? "Six Ways to Make People Like You"? Like THAT baby wouldn't come in handy when said sneaky little head-hunting cannibals come to eat me!

4. My son's Boy Scout Manual might come in handy. Secrets to tying kick-ass knots, how to build a sturdy shelter, what roots and berries I'm allowed to eat, how to build an igloo... you know, helpful survival tips. Definitely. And when I got rescued there would be merit badges!

5. My books of scriptures, duh! Like I wouldn't be praying like HELL for God to send someone to help me get the freak off the island!

7. What 3 people am I going to tag with these questions and why?
There was always one part of teaching I loved, and that was when my students would finally cut loose and spill their sincere actual opinions and thoughts into their otherwise affected, sometimes smarmy, all-too-often banal verbiage. I think these two ladies would definitely cut loose, spill, and be fun to read. And maybe, quite possibly, a tad less tongue-in-cheek than I can usually manage.
*sigh* It's a character flaw.

Circus Kelli

Then there's this dude. Kristine's significant other, correct? I chose him because he's freaking hilarious. "Flea Market Idol"? Genius.


link | posted by Cat at 7:23 PM

Anonymous mrtl commented:

Typing fast during AI commercial. I agree with Mike. This is some good stuff! The gushing at the beginning? Totally believable.

» 3/24/2005 8:11 PM 
Blogger Cat commented:

;) Heh.

Aaaaaand, buh-bye, Mikalah! Dang. Too bad all the inside scoops I've read say she is, in reality, a total sweetheart that all the contestants love to death! It makes me feel kinda sad for her, actually...

Ah, she's young. A little disappointment won't kill her.

» 3/24/2005 8:36 PM 
Blogger Mamaramma commented:

Hello, my name is Mamaramma, and I'm an American Idoloholic. I actually yelled at my dad tonight for calling me when American Idol was on. American Idol has the power to ruin my relationships, and I find that the more I watch, the more I need to watch. I feel like this blog is a safe place where I can talk about my problem.
SO... I, for one, am glad that Mikalah is gone because I do think it's about the singing. Which is why I also think that we need to say goodbye to Constantine - may I ask what is your attraction to him? I'm being serious, not bitchy. He seems to me t be trying to do his best Michael Hutchins from INXS impression (visually, not vocally) and therefore, he seems so affected. I dunno. I'm no expert.
Thanks for visiting my blog! If you'd like to vent your AI feelings over there, stop by anytime.

» 3/24/2005 9:21 PM 
Blogger Circus Kelli commented:

Uh, wha? I've been tagged?! What? Are you kidding me with this?! Here I am, going along, minding my own bidness and like WHAMMO! I'm TAGGED?!


No hablo ingl├ęs

(which I initially typed as:
No hable English.
Totally believeable, no?)

ok ok ok... is there a time limit on this??

» 3/28/2005 8:29 AM 

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