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Desperate Working Mommas
Your one-stop site for fanatical television snarking, questionable political analysis, occasional attempts to address the parenting issues facing working mothers, and halfhearted promises to stop obsessing about the entertainment industry, already! Oh, not to mention the random bitching and moaning. There's always that.
Thursday, May 12, 2005
Seriously. What a GYP!

In honor of Federal Fitness Day, I JUST participated in our annual 2.5 mile Fun Run.

The fact that I haven't run in, oh, say, two months didn't faze me at all. No sir. I joked around with other runners, who had all been training and were properly signed up, I might add, and I assured them I would be the one huffing and puffing at the back of the pack, due to my general out-of-shapiness. Because my friend/coworker convinced me to sign up 2 minutes before the race started, I wouldn't be eligible to earn group points toward my department, but I was all, "No biggie. I'll just run for fun, right?"

Okay, any of you in the mighty Blogosphere who know me personally will see the Catch-22 inherent in this plan. BIG TIME.

Because I am SO not kidding when I say I am one competitive mofo. By the time any other woman (and many of the men) caught up with me, I had already crossed the finish line amidst cheers of "Go Cat!" and "Woo! GIRL, GO!!", breaking the tape across my chest triumphantly (I've ALWAYS wanted to break the tape!), the Chariots of Fire score blaring in my head.

Na, naaaaaaa (ch-CH-ch-ch-ch, ch-CH-ch-ch-ch) Nuh NUH nuh nuh NUUUUUUH nuh...

Now, don't get me wrong. Even though my victory was meaningless as far as points for my department go, I was obviously full of pride for a job well-done.

Because I totally won first place in the women's category. FIRST PLACE! I am a TOTAL Federal Fitness Day 2.5 Mile Fun Run champion! Bow to my glory! Because, seriously, I kicked some major ass, people. I may have felt like vomiting for two full hours afterward, but I WON! But seriously, even though it was all for naught, it was fine. I was FINE. SUPER fine. SERIOUSLY.

Until they whipped out the trophies.

TROPHIES?! Come on! No one said ANYTHING about freaking TROPHIES!!!! I mean, really, people. A little head's up would have been nice.

When I saw the woman who came in a full minute and a half after me walk up and grab her "Fitness Day 2005 Fun Run First Place Winner" trophy, and there was no mention made of my glorious personal victory, I think I may have died a little inside. Oh, yes. Just DEAD. Because I am a shocking Glory 'Ho, y'all.

Oh, sure, she dedicated it to me, shouting, "Cat really deserves this!", and even offered to share it with me, but I nobly rejected her suggestion. On account of my general coolness and whatnot. And I DID get to break the tape, and she totally didn't. Nanny, nanny, nyah!! IN! YOUR! FACE! SUCKAH!

But, seriously. Why didn't SOMEONE mention the trophies? Huh? WHY?!

I want my trophy. What a gyp.

link | posted by Cat at 1:51 PM


6 Comments:
Blogger KC commented:

Um, yeah, OK - so you just ran 2.5 miles and beat all the other girls?

I'm not sure I could run more than 5 feet and that's only if there was a pint of Ben and Jerry's waiting for me at the end...

You rock! And you totally deserve a trophy.

» 5/12/2005 1:21 PM 
Anonymous Anonymous commented:

Cat, I have known you your whole life, and you've always been better at everything, than anyone else you knew... My ex used to really hate you for that... Anyhow, you might as well compete against yourself and your own bests. You don't need the trophy anyway... it's the poor souls who try but can never attain what you have that need the reassurance of a little cheap trophy!

» 5/12/2005 1:23 PM 
Anonymous Anonymous commented:

Cat, you rock. Me and Tanner and the grrls are very proud of you!

» 5/12/2005 2:02 PM 
Anonymous Anonymous commented:

Cat, you rock. Me and Tanner are very proud of you...

» 5/12/2005 2:02 PM 
Blogger Nessa commented:

WOW! I'm impressed! I would have died doing the 2 feet run!

» 5/12/2005 2:05 PM 
Blogger Cat commented:

Ooooooh, Ben & Jerry's!! Mmmm-hmmm! Actually, there were some tasty strawberry cream puffs and other assorted goodies set out for the runners after the race, but as I felt like vomiting, I didn't enjoy them as much as one would think. Shame, really.

Jenny? Is that you? *sigh* You KNOW I likes me the "cheap little trophies." Thanks for the nice, completely undeserved compliment, though. Love you.

» 5/12/2005 2:44 PM 

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